When you hear the words self-care, what comes to mind?
A luxury spa day?
A weekend away?
A yoga retreat in the countryside?
They all sound lovely… but let’s be honest.
Most working mums don’t have the time, money, or childcare to disappear for a weekend every time life gets overwhelming.
For years, I thought self-care had to be something big. Something planned. Something I’d get around to “one day.”
The reality?
That day never came.
Instead, I discovered that the little things make the biggest difference. The small habits that help me feel calmer, more patient, and a little more like myself again.
If you’re feeling overwhelmed, exhausted or stretched in every direction, here are the self-care habits that have genuinely helped me.
1. I Stopped Feeling Guilty for Resting
This one took me a long time.
I used to believe I had to earn my rest.
The washing had to be done.
The emails had to be answered.
The kitchen had to be spotless.
There was always one more thing.
But eventually I realised something…
The to-do list never ends.
If you wait until everything is finished before taking a break, you’ll never stop.
Rest isn’t something you have to earn.
It’s something you need.
2. I Started Saying “No” More Often
As mums, we say yes to everything.
School events.
Extra work.
Helping friends.
Volunteering.
Family favours.
Eventually, there’s nothing left for ourselves.
Learning to politely say no has protected my time and my energy far more than I expected.
Sometimes saying no to one thing means saying yes to your own wellbeing.
3. I Prioritised Sleep Over Productivity
There was a time I’d stay up late trying to squeeze one more thing into the day.
I’d answer emails.
Fold washing.
Scroll social media.
Then wonder why I felt exhausted the next morning.
Now, I try to protect my sleep wherever I can because I’ve realised I’m a much better mum and business owner when I’m well rested.
Social media has a funny way of making it look like everyone else has it all together.
Perfect homes.
Perfect businesses.
Perfect children.
Perfect routines.
The truth?
We’re only seeing the highlight reel.
I’ve learnt to focus on what’s working for my family instead of trying to copy someone else’s version of success.
5. I Get Outside Whenever I Can
Fresh air works wonders.
Even a fifteen-minute walk helps clear my head.
Some of my best ideas have arrived while walking rather than sitting at my desk trying to force them.
You don’t need a five-mile hike.
Just stepping outside for a few minutes can completely change your mood.
6. I Keep My Self-Care Realistic
Forget the expensive spa days.
My version of self-care usually looks more like:
Drinking a hot cup of tea before it goes cold.
Reading a chapter of a book.
Sitting in the garden for ten minutes.
Listening to music while cooking dinner.
Watching an episode of my favourite programme.
Having an uninterrupted shower.
It doesn’t have to be extravagant to make a difference.
7. I Ask for Help
For years, I thought asking for help meant I wasn’t coping.
Now I know it means I’m human.
Whether it’s asking my partner to take over bedtime, accepting help from family, or simply talking things through with another mum, sharing the load makes life feel much lighter.
You don’t have to carry everything on your own.
8. I Let Go of Perfection
This has probably been the biggest lesson of all.
Some days the house is tidy.
Some days it’s chaos.
Some weeks I tick everything off my to-do list.
Other weeks I’m just proud everyone got fed.
And that’s okay.
Perfection isn’t the goal.
Peace is.
9. I Protect My Mental Space
I’ve become much more aware of what drains my energy.
Sometimes that means spending less time scrolling.
Sometimes it means switching my phone off for an hour.
Sometimes it means closing the laptop when my working day is finished.
Creating boundaries has been one of the biggest acts of self-care I’ve ever given myself.
10. I Remember That Looking After Myself Helps My Family Too
This was the mindset shift I needed.
Looking after myself isn’t selfish.
When I’m rested, calmer and happier…
I’m more patient.
More productive.
More present.
More able to enjoy time with my family.
Self-care doesn’t take away from the people we love.
It helps us show up as the best version of ourselves.
Frequently Asked Questions
What is realistic self-care for working mums?
Realistic self-care is anything that helps you recharge without adding more pressure. It could be taking a short walk, reading a book, getting enough sleep, or simply taking ten minutes to yourself with a cup of tea.
Why do working mums often neglect self-care?
Many mums naturally prioritise everyone else’s needs before their own. Over time, this can lead to stress, exhaustion and burnout if they never make time to rest.
Is self-care selfish?
Not at all. Looking after yourself improves your physical and mental wellbeing, which benefits both you and your family.
How can I make time for self-care when I’m busy?
Start small. Even ten minutes a day can make a difference. Self-care doesn’t need to be expensive or time-consuming to be effective.
Final Thoughts
I’ve learnt that self-care isn’t about adding another task to your already overflowing to-do list.
It’s about giving yourself permission to slow down.
To rest.
To ask for help.
To accept that “good enough” really is enough.
Because you’re already doing an incredible amount every single day.
And you deserve the same kindness you so freely give to everyone else.
If you’re also trying to build a business or earn extra income around family life, remember that success doesn’t have to come at the expense of your wellbeing.
Ready to Build a Business Without Burning Yourself Out?
If you’re looking for realistic ways to earn around family life while protecting your time and energy, my eBook 5 Ways to Make Passive Income for Female Entrepreneurs shares practical ideas designed for busy mums who want flexibility without the hustle culture.
